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Monday, April 7, 2014

4/8/14 - Inattention

I've been completely forgetting to do this thing lately. I've been avoiding most of my social networks, being immersed in my game on the server. I'm making a lot of AFK farms though, so I'm making myself walk away from the computer for longer stretches of time.

My sleep has been more stable, though I am still falling asleep kind of late (anywhere from midnight to 5 AM). But I haven't had any bad all-nighters lately.

I have been having a lot of negative thoughts here and there, and I'm starting to feel like maybe my life isn't really hopeless, maybe my brain is just making me think that and keeping me from doing anything about it. I'm starting to feel so beaten down by these moods that for the first time I'm starting to think medication might be a good idea. Though I'm still not too keen on it. It just feels like me giving up some more.

Nothing is making me happy. I've just been numb, unmotivated. I've been building a lot of things in-game, but my workshop has been stagnant. I really can't afford to keep being like this.

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